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Friday, 16 July 2004
Monday, 12 July 2004
 After a day in Malibu, Kev and I stopped by a liquor store, where I bought a mini bottle of ginseng and chased it with some Red Bull. Some poopernazi says it was a shot of booze! Whoa, did I catch shit for that.
Posted by bsincca at 1:01 AM PDT
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Updated: Thursday, 9 September 2004 4:42 PM PDT Friday, 9 July 2004
Tuesday, 6 July 2004
Monday, 5 July 2004
Sunday, 4 July 2004
 Check out my 5-carat engagement ring. Kewl, huh? Yup Kevin and I were betrothed as it were on June 25. We spent the Fourth of July weekend celebrating in Maui at the Fairmont Kea Lani villa. We hung out on the beach, played in the ocean and went deep-sea fishing too. Plus we did a lot of fishing around for other stuff.
Posted by bsincca at 12:01 AM PDT
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Updated: Thursday, 9 September 2004 5:07 PM PDT Thursday, 1 July 2004
 Okay. Like yesterday we (Kevin and I) were interviewed by People and here's the scoop: Yes, it was me who initially popped the question to Kevin during our flight back to the United States from Europe. Kevin was taken by surprise and said, "No.", because he thought the guy was supposed to ask the girl. After a couple minutes went by and then he asked me. I kind of knew he was going to come back and ask me. And I said yes, of course. It was kind of special.
Posted by bsincca at 9:54 AM PDT
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Updated: Wednesday, 8 September 2004 10:48 AM PDT Wednesday, 30 June 2004
 While we were just friends at the time I always saw him as more then a friend, but was afraid of ruining the friendship if we took it further. I confided in Fe, my assistant and best friend at the time about what I felt for Justin, how I truly believed that he was the man of my dreams. It turns out at the same time, Justin was telling Lance the same exact things, but like me he didn't want to tell me how he felt for fear of losing me as a friend. I guess Lance and Fe got fed up with hearing each of us talk about each other and not do anything, so as my time on the *Nsync tour was coming to a close. Fe and Lance put Justin and me in a room and had us tell each other how we felt. We didn't hold anything back, he told me how he thought I was the girl of his dreams and I told him I thought of him the same way. It was that day, almost two and half years ago, that we officially started dating. People claim we lied about the whole dating thing to our fans, but I don't see it that way. Justin always said it was a decision. When I was ready to tell the world we were dating then that's when we would do it, but only when I was fully ready. I'll admit when we first started dating it was odd. I mean he was my best friend and now he's my boyfriend, but not only that, he was always away from me making it even weirder. The main reason I didn't immediately go and tell everyone we were dating the first chance I could was because like everyone else that's starting a relationship things weren't very certain. Everything seemed so good to be true that I was waiting for it to fall apart any minute. If it did fall apart then you'd have the pressure of the media with all these questions and that's something I just didn't want to face. Another major reason I didn't want to tell the fans was, both Justin's and my career were taking off. This type of announcement could lose fans or just totally ruin our careers. I could forever be known as "Justin Timberlake's Girlfriend" or he could be known as "Britney Spears' Boyfriend." That chance of never really getting a name for ourselves was kind of scary and something I didn't want. I wanted to be known as Britney Spears and he as Justin Timberlake, with successful careers in the entertainment business that we both worked for ourselves. I didn't want to hear people saying things like He used me or I used him if one of us got bigger then the other. Emotionally that would do something to you because you worked so hard for something and then you're being told you didn't do any of the work and someone else did. The third and final reason we kept it for so long was honestly I was afraid for my safety. Justin's fans at the time weren't very stable and making an announcement like that who knows what would happen. The fans, his fans, have a vision that he is single and waiting for them. Some still have this idea but not as many as before. Having them find out their future husband is taken they could have harmed him or me during a concert, walking down the street or just shopping. Neither one of us wanted to risk our lives so we kept it a strict secret between us and anyone else that knew of what we were doing. I can't tell you how hard it is to date someone but yet you have to deny any ideas that you are. This got so hard the more serious our relationship got. He and I would be cuddling and kissing one night, watching a movie just doing what regular couples does.Yet the next night or a day or so later we have to go to some awards show, I can't go with him and I most certainly can't sit with him. If he does walk over to me to talk or something the fans that are there make a huge deal out of it. It's just so much easier to pretend we don't even know each other at those types of events. We talked it over and decided, no eye contact, no talking and most certainly never looking in the other person's direction. We were doing what the fans wanted, denying true love so we could do what we wanted to do, live out our dreams. A year into our relationship, for my birthday Justin gave me a promise ring. He had a matching ring made up for him. As soon as he gave it to me I wanted to slip it on my ring finger and never ever take it off. I was that certain he was the one I wanted. Before I permentantly placed the ring there Justin reminded me that rumors were going around about us dating, a ring on my ring finger would make people thing we were engaged. Instead of my ring finger, I slipped it on my pinky. Justin did the same with his. But for some odd reason he decided that my nickname should be pinky to stand for the ring that I promised to wear forever on that finger. The fans, both Justin's and mine are a lot smarter then we think they are. They can pick up on something no matter how well we try to hide it. Within days of each of us wearing the rings they had it spread all over the news, and Internet, and we weren't even in the same part of the country. I don't believe for one moment that we fooled anyone with our "we're just friends" answer to every question about us dating. What it did do though was soften the blow for the fans that would maybe take it a little harder. Finally what seemed like forever I got tired of hiding it and went to talk to Justin who as I said earlier instantly went along with what I wanted. We decided that the 2000 VMA's was the place to come clean, or at least start the beginning of publicly dating. We were going to sit next to each other during the show. What a relief it was to sit with him and not half way across the room from him. I could finally be with my boyfriend, hold hands and whisper comments to him. After that appearance we made no attempt to hide any further engagements. If we wanted to do something together we no longer had to go to great odds to hide it. We just went out and did it, which made life so much easier for me and for him. We had decided not to release a statement about us dating. I mean whose business is it anyways. We just figured that when one of us was asked we'd just casually say, "Yes we are." And leave it at that. Justin was the first asked about us dating. It was the Rosie O'Donnell Show in November of 2000. A fan had sent in a question asking if he was REALLY dating Britney Spears. There was a slight pause as he looked over to who knows where and answered simply "Yeah." At that moment most of the people in the audience cheered and Rosie went on to the next question. She didn't pry in further to our relationship just left it at that. Now everything that needed to be done was done and we could just start working on us. It's really hard to say how Justin and I keep such a strong relationship. We hardly see each other and when we do it's only for a few days at a time. I guess you could say it's the little things he does, like sending flowers if he heard I was having a bad day or if I called him up all upset about something. The lack of time we do get together has made us both realize how special we are to each other. I feel so blessed to have someone who understands exactly what I am going through. If something comes up and I told him we'd go out he understands that this job is so unpredictable. As of the summer of 2001 both of our careers had really taken off. *Nsync was bigger now than they ever were before, and they deserved everything they have and so much more. And I was working on my movie that would appear sometime in the spring of 2002. With our money Justin and I both brought a house in Los Angeles together. I'm sure you're all wondering what my mom would say about this. That's the thing we didn't tell her until the house was bought and in both of our names. There isn't much she can say when it's already done and I'm 19. Justin and I aren't in Los Angeles too much at the same time, so it's not like we're really living together we own a house together. Upon buying the house together and occasionally staying together lead to the question of, "are you two still virgins?" That is the most personal question you could ask anyone and I'm sick of being asked that. If Justin and I have done anything together that is between us and only us. I refuse to tell the world about any sexual acts I do with him. And with that note I'm moving on.
Posted by bsincca at 1:01 AM PDT
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Updated: Wednesday, 8 September 2004 10:25 AM PDT Tuesday, 29 June 2004
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